Sunday, February 27, 2011

I me myself

I've heard/read the phrase "My life flashed before my eyes" many times. I had no clue about it until recently.

It did not happen when I had an accident because I was riding my bike fast and reckless. It did not happen when I was on a slippery rock just about to fall but luckily managed alive. It did not happen when I heard that I got into BITS-Goa. It did not happen when I heard about the death of my dearest and only pet.

It happened when I was writing an SOP for GD/PI of NMIMS. I thought a lot and finally decided to modify the SOP of kichha's friend and use it. But then I would be projecting the personality and image of someone else and not mine. I decided to write one for myself. But I liked a phrase from kichha's friend's SOP. It goes as "One's formative years go a long way in deciding what one achieves". It was very catchy. I wanted to use something similar.

After a little bit of introspection, I wrote this phrase. "One's dreams go a long way in shaping one's pursuits". "How true" I told myself. As soon as I finished typing the phrase, I went on and typed "I dream of purpose and freedom". At first it sounded kinda unreal. But then this is a line that came out from my mind without any thought. It must have some relevance to me.

I looked back at my life and this line explains it all. All those times I used to wonder why do I do/like so and so and why do I not do/like so and so. Whatever I do and whatever I dream of. They are always based on these two simple words rather virtues. PURPOSE and FREEDOM. The two words that define me.

The purpose of my life is to have a purpose and the goal is freedom. Complete freedom. Easy to state but pretty confusing. Hope I'll get a better understanding of myself, sometime, soon.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

My first public speech

I was at my home in front of my computer sorting songs in my iPod, to hear during my journey to mumbai. There was a small gathering in my veranda. I came to know that they are volunteers from DYFI branch in my village. My dad being a prominent person, was the chief guest. I was not even remotely interested.

The meeting had started and I was busy in my own world. After a while, my dad came in and asked me to come over and sit in the meeting. Even though I resisted, I finally went into the veranda. I went out with the intention to click photos when my dad gives away prizes at the end of the meeting. There were about 40 volunteers, majority students. A core committee member was speaking and he was talking about lots of things, especially about unemployment. I could sense that the gist of his speech was to motivate students to join DYFI and to guide their conduct.

After his speech ended, it was my dad's turn. It was already getting late and there were a lot of patients waiting. My dad wanted to end the meeting very soon and hence said he will not speak. Then everyone turned to me. I wanted to speak in front of public but was not sure of what to speak. My dad looked at me and hinted a volunteer that this is not the time since I knew nothing about DYFI.

Then there was a small prize distribution session. I inquired a volunteer about the audience and the motto of the meeting in the mean time. I told him that I would speak after the prize distribution. Finally the moment arrived and a speaker announced that I would be speaking. I could see the fear in my dad's face. What if I speak some nonsense. It will damage my dad's reputation and make me look like a jack ass. Nonetheless, I wanted to tell my dad that I can give a speech too.

Here is the gist of what I spoke.
"Hello everyone. I haven't spoke to any of you before. I don't know any of you. Hell I even don't know what is going on here. But let me share an experience of mine.

I did my Engineering in BITS. During my college, I did a very few extra curricular activities by being a part of Decoration club and Controls club. I could have completed my college without doing all of these and moreover they did not add to my grades either. But by doing these, I helped my college.

Similarly even you people are helping your society. As someone said, "Ask not what your society has given you but what you have given your society". Hence social work is important for an individual to be satisfied morally.

I am now working in FOSSEE. It is a project that focuses on promoting Free Software. The company instead of paying for commercial software uses free software, thereby reducing the cost of the product being manufactured. I am helping the society indirectly. But what you do as a part of DYFI is helping the society directly. Each and every meeting you conduct. Each medical camp you conduct benefit your (our) people directly. You are idols for the remaining youth in the village.

But you also have a responsibility. Your conduct is a reflection of DYFI. Hence, whatever you do in or out of DYFI will bear a direct consequence on its public image. For a good man to become bad, it only takes a moment. But he has to stay good all his life to remain good.

I wish all of you would bear this in your mind and continue doing social work in DYFI."

Moreover, I had a good body language and tone. Thanks to all the FOSSEE workshops.

Many speakers knew me from my childhood and only perceived me as a kid. This came as a shock or rather amusement to all of them. Many of them appreciated me for the speech. I could see the happiness on my dad's face.

I finally proved something to my dad. I felt I could have done much better. But this is a speech I gave with literally no preparation. It came directly from my heart in front of 40 students. I am happy with that.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Why do we live

now how do I start??
well I have already started.
I have watched a documentary " Imagine The Secret of Life ".
Now rest of the post is all about how "I understood" the documentary and my feelings hence forth.

In this documentary, the narrator goes on a journey meeting all the psychoanalysts and psychiatrists. He talks to many great authors of the Best sellers in self help. The whole self help boils down to one single quote, "We become what we think about".
In the end of the show, we are drawn to the conclusion "do we really need self help?".
we are stuck up to this idea of fulfilling our desires thinking that we would feel happy in the end. But we forget that our desires are endless
We rush through through things for that one moment of happiness. But we forget that Happiness is something that is found throughout the journey and not in the end because in the end, there is no more journey.
Relax and enjoy every moment in your life.
Right now I can "listen" to the calm surroundings and "feel" air through my wind pipe and the enjoy feeling that I am accomplishing something by writing this post. I am enjoying the jargon of thoughts running in my mind.
Finally don't just exist but live. Live the moment. Every moment in your life.

Monday, March 2, 2009

How I got my braces off !!!

I have been thinking rather planning to get my braces off.
Its already been 8 months i since got these and I think I've had them long enough to straighten just one tooth ...

Anyways it all started on Sunday ( I did nothing but just being awake, didnt even eat anything ).
I then decided to start being a little organized and punctual at everything.
So I made action plan for the next day ( today ):
0. Go for Jogging
1. Wash myclothes
2. Get something done to this braces ( I was getting uncomfortable )

So I went to bed at 1:00 and set my alarm at 5:15 but couldnt sleep.
So I woke up at 2:00 and started browsing the net.
At 4:00 came my friend asking my opposite room guy for playing cards and as usual I went along with the playing cards and we played "PALASA" till 8:00.

Naturally I was hungry since I didnt eat yesterday and so I had my breakfast.
As usual the so called breakfast was actually some chefs experiment with semiya to prepare upma.

Then I thought it may be a good idea to soak the clothes so that I would be forced to wash them today itself and so I did.

Then I slept at 10:00 woke up at 12:00 and then washed my clothes, then took bath and had my lunch and was back in my room ( what to do now!!! mode ) by 14:30.

So now is when the planning helped. I remembered that i still have this teeth problem in to-do list.

I googled and found few dentists in Goa.

The Vasco dental hospital guys asked me to meet the junior doctor first who would diagnise me and would set up an appointment with a specialist who would be coming on March 6th.
I dropped the option and called smile dental care. The doctor there said he will finish the job today itself which was precisely what i wanted. But the hospital is in Calangute which means 3 buses and 2 hrs of travel just to get there.

But I've decided to go and so started from my campus at 16:00 but chose the wrong way to go to panjim i.e., through verna. Firstly I didnt get a direct bus to titan so went to birla and then to titan. Luckily got a bus to panjim from there without having to wait so long.

Now here is the best part of the journey, from panjim to calangute.

The conductor literally STUFFED people into the bus and the driver was driving as if the time has slowed down. The narrow goan roads made the condition even worse. The driver applies sudden brakes once every minute and it took him 1 hr to travel a mere 20kms. Damn!!! transport in goa sucks big time.

Finally I saw the clinic and it was located amidst all kinds of shops for the tourists.
After I got there I had all kinds of doubts about the doctor and my position if something goes wrong. But the moment I got into the clinic ( one room for reception and one room for doctor which also had the equipment doctor needs and a bed for the patient ) I somehow felt better.

The doctor was great he took 3 minutes to get my braces off and another 3 minutes to clear my teeth of all the sticky substance. Finally he said its done and you can pay the bill at reception.
The lady at reception simply said 1k ( omg 1k for 5 minutes!!! may be even I should have taken BDS ).

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

My first blog

I have been thinking a lot about what to write in my blog.

"This is a blog so write something or anything or everything",I said to myself.
OK so let me write anything that comes to my mind.

""" Its 14:40 and so cool here in the office,I dont know why these people waste so much energy over this Air conditioning system.

Oh!!! thank god they switched it off. Did the assistant read my mind or it was my CEO who just passed by me read what Iam writing here.

Whatever let me continue...

I had made a list of things to do if at all i feel bored any time during the day.But this is more interesting and may be I should add blogging to that list.

Or may be I shouldn't cuz I haven't done even one from that list even though felt bored many times.

This always happens...things you dont plan go well than those you actually do.
Sometimes it also happens the other way.May be its just a matter of fate and all that happens to you happens for a cause.

Everyday I decide to note down all my mistakes I have done in the day and read through them the next day so that i dont repeat them.

But it is the same mistake I keep doing, I dont make a note of mistakes in the first place and so its all the same everyday.

But there is one thing that is getting better in me day by day. My style of coding in python and the pace at which I type.

Btw Python I feel is more of a tool than a language. You can get many complicated things done in just few lines of code.

Hey this is nice I can even post a few of programs i have written in python. Mind you they will surely come handy some day.

ok i'm done and will post the next time i feel bored. """